Aloha..........

Just come back from the hospital and if u are wondering why?
It's because of the of the bleeding....Though I'm immune to the pain but the fact is internal bleeding is not to be toyed with.....

Reflections after reflections had been done and I've come to a realization.

I'm never gonna take back whatever that is written or said caused I meant every single one of them....2009 was full of ups and downs,an experienced like no other.Start the year being left all alone when u went away for a holliday.Was left alone again in the cell fighting against all odds.Was alone again when I know ur feeling have drifted away time and again.When u don't even wanna see,meet me.Alone again going thru the turmoil of seeing my mother,colleague had a brush against death...Last and not least,being alone drenched wet waiting for u,for ur birthday.

I know our standards differ greatly.U are well to do.Whereby I'm just a peasant.Making ends meets.I cannot give u that luxurious wedding that u dream off.I can never compete with u/ur family.

Irony isn't it when suddenly is these modern world such primitive thinking still exist,in these modern world a mother would disown her own child just because she is dating a guy of a different race.An alien.....a sub-species....
It could be a pure reason or maybe I'm just unqualified at all....

I have always been a fighter.Not a royalty of any kind.Being there for everyone except for myself.I thought I will never learn to respect love again but I was wrong i fell deeper than before.and now I know it meant nothing at all.Nothing...........

I've spent 3yrs serving u,ur highness hope it was worth it......

My only love sprung from my only hate,too early seen unknown when known too late(my only hate is love)
Now just like any fighter I'm useless because I'm injured,ain't not gonna bother whatever the doctor say,he ain't no god,I'm goin to push thru this limits.....These challenge I just don't FUCKING care,give me my ale and i shall go to that godforsaken place.....

With these words i end my entry...................................................